"Keir Starmer Wonderin' How" - Marsh Family parody of "The Farmer and the Cowman" from Oklahoma

This one was a quick turnaround ... but events have been unfolding fast this week in the wake of the Labour disaster in the elections across the United Kingdom, which has led to a major rebellion and a likely challenge to Keir Starmer's faltering leadership of the Party.

We've been hanging on - like Starmer - but in our case to a song from Oklahoma! that rhymes with his name ... the upbeat chirpy factional dance number, "The Farmer and the Cowman" which was composed by Rodgers and Hammerstein in 1943. We ducked the elaborate dance sequence but tried to add a bit of humour with the adaptation and timings.

There are a number of fairly niche references to trace - some of them to the football (soccer) team that Starmer supports, Arsenal FC who have been very successful this season with a rather dogged resilient style built around defence. Others to the history of the Labour Party and some of the current crop of possible leadership contenders - for which you can find details below:

- https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cvgzv4eqdrno

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LYRICS
Keir Starmer’s wonderin’ how to make amends
Oh, Keir Starmer’s wonderin’ how to make amends
Wants to fight the nation’s doubt
Another try to set things out
It’s silly season all over again

Anti-Tory votes didn’t last forever
Anti-Tory votes were all eggshells
One last chance now in Labour’s quarter
Starmer’s stance isn’t boding well

[REPEAT]

I’d like to say a word for Keir Starmer …
[awkward silence]
I’d like to say a word for Keir Starmer
He done his best when lots requ-ired mending
He didn’t rest from making lots of changes
Just none of them were ones he was intending!

Keir Starmer is a good and gritty Englishman
No matter that his manner kind of stinks
He won’t lie under oath, always sees a path to growth
The rest of us just end up seeing shrinks!

Keir Starmer’s wonderin’ how he should defend
Oh, Keir Starmer’s wonderin’ how he should defend
Gunners fans love ‘minutes plus’, V.A.R. and ‘park the bus’
But that don’t help a scoreline of nil-ten!

Errors unprovoked he made as leader
Enemies he stoked who took his falls
Led a merry dance by the right-wing media
Starmer’s answers were all stonewalls

We might soon hear some words from the new boy
Wes Streeting’s face is critical and stony
He holds the starter’s gun
Just don’t mention Mandelson!
Or the fact he might be labelled “Poor Man’s Tony”!

Keir Starmer’s not reproachable as a playboy
But did row round and round in choppy waters
He might have stopped some boats, but was haemorrhaging votes
Seems a British leader’s lifespan’s getting shorter!

Now Labour’s wonderin’ how this nightmare ends
Is it Rayner, Burnham, Milliband again …


Markets twitchy, sensing doubt, make it quick or long drawn out?
Rachel Reeves is trying to rally friends

And while the media’s feasting we’re all payin’
Our politics a farce of jungle kings
The stage used to be calm – now it’s panic and alarm
When there’s actual fascists waiting in the wings!

The stage used to be calm – now it’s panic and alarm
When there’s actual fascists waiting in the wings!

How are we supposed to stick together
With politicos who make such mess
Starmer’s toast but you wonder whether
Anyone can win with a modern press!


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THANKS SO MUCH TO PATREONS (HOWLERS below):

Jeremy Sedgley,
John Hanger,
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Sacramento Scott,
Christian Schranz,
Peter Green,
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Wolfgang Tampier,
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Douglas Lind,
David Ryan,
Simon Haslam,
Lew,
Mike Smith,
Andy Riches,
Cliff Hope,
Carol Leff,
Geeta & Karen (Alyssa Sangeeta Jacobson Memorial),
David Patrao,
Grandad